FREE POSTAGE OF ORDERS OVER $150 AUSTRALIA WIDE

Mum, am I fat?

Posted on October 09 2016


As you know, from one of my previous posts, School Mornings - the struggle is real -  mornings are a little bit crazy in my house. There is yelling, fighting, chaos. Clothes are flung around, there is food on the floor, no one ever has socks and it's just general mayhem.

What I didn't disclose, is that my own personal routine is not so smooth sailing either.

Thanks to the longest renovations in history, also previously referenced in my The Renovations Post, we only have one functioning bathroom at the moment. That also happens to be our ensuite. So our bedroom and bathroom is a public free-for-all.

Quite often I'm in the shower, mr 2 is taking a loud and potent crap, and the girls are fighting over sink space. It's loud, it's crazy, and horribly public. My children are not adverse to sharing their charming opinions of me either, often referring to hoping to never have disgusting boobs like mum, like RIGHT in front of me.

A particular day last week, I was in the midst of my usual 'what the f**k will I wear today' dilemma. Like seriously, this happens every day. You have no idea how much I wish my mum would come and lay out my clothes.

My outfit decision will usually take me from coffee, wee, and shower to decide. And sometimes even after. I stand in my wardrobe staring, or sit on my bed naked surrounded by clothes I've pulled from hangers and will probably not put back - just re-wash.

I chose an outfit, put it on, looked in the mirror and went 'Nup'. As I went back to the drawing board, tearing off my clothes, my daughter said, "what are you doing? That looks good!' "No it doesn't" I said, "I look fat". She rolled her eyes at me and walked out.

I finally got dressed, got them off to school and went about my day, having no idea of the situation I had just created.

The next morning, as we are all getting ready, my daughter comes in wearing just a crop top, and her school skort pulled up so far that Harry High Pants would have been impressed. I looked at her puzzled, and said "Dude, that can't be comfy", she said "it's not but it hides my stomach". 

My blood ran cold.

"Why do you need to hide your stomach?" I said. She didn't answer me, just brushed her teeth, did her hair and put on her t-shirt.

Troubled, I went out to the kitchen and started clearing the breakfast mess (transferring from table to bench). I noticed that there was no mess from her spot.

"Did you have breakfast Bub?" "Nah, I don't feel like it", she said.

I have seen this kid inhale 2 hotdogs without breathing. 2 toasted sandwiches is no effort. A punnet of blueberries, strawberries and a banana without flinching. She loves food (like me) and it gives her great pleasure. She's also really active, 2 games of netball a week, plus training and dancing.

She is not a big breakfast eater so I wasn't totally concerned, but I knew that this was something I really had to keep my eye on.

That afternoon she had a crack at me for not packing enough healthy stuff in her lunch.

That night, as she put on her netball dress, she stomped out of her room and said "Mum, am I fat?".

It was time for a talk.

I asked her why all of a sudden she was concerned. She told me that her legs were bigger than heaps of the girls at school. That her stomach stuck out and only looked 'good' when she held it in. That the reason she asked for high waisted shorts for her birthday was so they would hold in her tummy.

She is 10 years old. The truth is, her body is changing. She is more solid than her sister, who looks like match with the wood shaved off.

I explained to her very firmly that she was NOT fat. That her body is healthy and strong. That she has muscles and strength and shape.

That she was growing. Her body changing from a little girl. That this was normal, and right, and nothing to be ashamed of. I told her not to compare herself to anyone as we are all individuals and we all grow at different rates and stages into different shapes and sizes.

"Sooo", she says. "What about you? You think you are fat, if you can say it, why can't I?".

With deep sadness and regret, I apologised. I told her that I shouldn't say it. That it is irresponsible of me to say things like that in front of her.

There is so much pressure on us to 'look good'. I want my girls to be proud of themselves. To be comfortable in their own skin. To embrace whatever they are given.

But most of all, I want them to be kind to themselves. There are enough outside influences telling them how they should look, act and feel, they shouldn't also have to hear it from their mum.

My flippant comment about feeling fat, was just that. Flippant. But also potentially very dangerous. Especially to an impressionable young girl, who at the age of 10, should be more worried about whether she has matching shoes for her Barbie, or if there is a rogue cow wreaking havoc in her Minecraft village than her belly.

I know that this issue has been around since the dawn of time. That this is nothing new, and that countless mothers around the globe are dealing with this very issue.

I know that I have contributed to it, not just with my comment, but with other little comments I have made through the years. I'll admit, I've made comments when she's reached for the chips instead of the fruit. When she's laying on the couch when the sun is shining.

I need to keep making comments - but not the ones I've been making. No more mention of weight. It can't be about fat. It MUST be about health. About feeding your body and fuelling it for action, not condition. It's gotta be education, not dictation. She's a child, not an elite athlete, whose life depends on being weighed and measured.

We grew up in a house where there were no lollies, chips or biscuits. If we were hungry, the standard response was "there is fruit in the bowl and water in the tap". We would look longingly at our friends colourful lunchboxes, insanely jealous of the chips, mini mars bars and roll ups. Ours were colourful too - from fruit and vegetables. My mum was smart. She knew what she was doing. I think she was before her time.

Unfortunately for me, as soon as I got old enough, if I happened to get some money - tooth fairy, birthday, whatever - I spent it on food. Sh*tty, junky food. Because although it wasn't strictly forbidden, it was something that we craved as it wasn't within our reach.

Now, I'm no expert on food and nutrition in fact,
I'm a total hypocrite. As I've written this, I've eaten half a breadstick smothered in peanut butter and butter, whilst laying on the couch.

BUT - I realise the importance of moderation. Of non extremist ideals when it comes to food. I don't want to deprive my kids of everything, as I'm pretty sure, they will go down the road I did.

I have cut right back on the crap that I was buying. My new Thermomix will be used for good and not evil. Fruit and veggies are in abundance in our house, and I'm so lucky that they love them.

Our conversations about our bodies will focus on their health. Not their size. Never their size. And never fat.

Claire x


9 comments

  • NERO J: July 04, 2022

    I came across many testimonies on google testifying of DR EMU a voodoo spell caster that will help you cast a LOTTERY SPELL and give you the rightful numbers to win the lottery, i didn’t believe it, at first but as life got harder i decided to take a try, now my try has made me a millionaire, i have been playing all types of lottery since 4 years now but i have not win up to $1000, after contacting him he cast the LOTTERY SPELL and give me the hot figures behold i won $50,000 now i am a living testimony of the good work of DR EMU, it is my secret but i decided to make the world known too. It might be a help to any one who is interested, this happens last week ago you are free to contact him
    Email: emutemple@gmail.com
    WhatsApp phone number +2347012841542

  • NERO J: July 04, 2022

    I came across many testimonies on google testifying of DR EMU a voodoo spell caster that will help you cast a LOTTERY SPELL and give you the rightful numbers to win the lottery, i didn’t believe it, at first but as life got harder i decided to take a try, now my try has made me a millionaire, i have been playing all types of lottery since 4 years now but i have not win up to $1000, after contacting him he cast the LOTTERY SPELL and give me the hot figures behold i won $50,000 now i am a living testimony of the good work of DR EMU, it is my secret but i decided to make the world known too. It might be a help to any one who is interested, this happens last week ago you are free to contact him
    Email: emutemple@gmail.com
    WhatsApp phone number +2347012841542

  • Gavin Wear : July 02, 2022

    I am here to spread this good news to the entire world on how Dr Emu helped me solve my infertility problem and i am so happy now that i am now a mother because for over 4 years i have been trying to get pregnant and needed help, i and my husband always go for medical check up and the doctor always say that the both of us are fine and i have nowhere else to get help from and all hope was almost lost until one day i visited a friend of mine and i told her what i was passing through and she introduce me to this great spell caster called Dr Emu who helped her when she was in need of help, so i took a try to contact Dr Emu through his email and i explain all my problem to him and after we have talked he perform an infertility spell for me and after that he told me what i should do, and i followed the instruction he gave and after that he instructed to sleep with my husband and also i followed the instruction and he said that the next week i should go for medical check up and the doctor confirmed that i was 4 months pregnant and i was so happy that all my sorrows were gone for ever, i am so very happy now and also if you need any kind of help or the same line with mine, contact Dr Emu on his email: emutemple@gmail.com or call/text his whatsapp phone number +2347012841542 visit facebook page: https://web.facebook.com/Emu-Temple- 104891335203341

  • Nicole Morris : June 24, 2022

    I ordered a job spell on a Friday night and on Monday the place I applied for a job called for me to come by their office. They gave me the job I applied for and made me an offer of more per hour than I have ever made in my life! I am so happy! Government jobs sometimes are a slow process. You somehow managed to speed up that process, and I start in just a few days! DR EMU I will be forever grateful thanks once again. You can call on him for help on his email address emutemple@gmail.com or add him up on his WhatsApp +2347012841542. DR EMU also lent a helping hand to the following } 1. GETTING YOUR EX LOVER BACK. 2. WINNING LOTTERIES. 3. CHILD BEARING. 4. BREAKING OF GENERATION COURSE. 5. GETTING OF JOB. 6. JOB PROMOTION. 7. HERBAL CARE. 8. SPIRITUAL PROTECTION. 9. HERBAL CARE. 10. SPIRITUAL PRAYER. E.T.C.

  • Beth Walter: December 20, 2021

    How i got back my ex husband after he left me and our kids” I suggest you read my testimony. I’m Beth Walters from the United state, I’m so excited my husband is back after he left me for another woman. My husband was having an affair with a co-worker and i love my husband so much but he was cheating on me with his co-worker and this girl i think she uses witchcraft or black magic on my husband to make him hate me and this was so critical and uncalled-for, I cry all day and night for God to send me a helper to bring back my husband! I was really upset and I needed help, so I searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Lord Zuma can help get ex-boyfriend back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and I did it, then he did a love spell for me. 11hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he misses me so much, Oh My God! I was so happy, and today I am happy with my man again and we are joyfully living together. I thank the powerful spell caster Lord Zuma, he is so powerful and I decided to share my story online here. if you are here and your Lover is turning you down, or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact Lord Zuma for help now..Here’s his contact, spiritualherbalisthealing@gmail.com or WhatsApp him: +1 506 800 1647

  • Michelle: June 16, 2017

    I’m in the minority here but I think most people eat too much. In our family we intentionally restrict our eating. Small healthy salads with a little meat.

  • Renae: October 12, 2016

    Great read thanks Claire. I have always made a point of talking to my girls about healthy bodies without the mention of the ‘fat’ word. I remember comments made at me when I was a teenager that made me think maybe I was fat when I know now I bloody wasnt! A lot of worrying and self doubt over nothing so I dont want my girls wasting their life worrying about how they look or their size! And yes to never finding f***ing socks in the mornings!

  • taryn: October 11, 2016

    Oh Claire! I write about this time and time again. We need to learn to love our bodies and exercise for health not what we look like. Fantastic read. Love ❤️

  • Nicole : October 09, 2016

    I love this.. great read! I also recently got a thermo and it’s used for all sorts of healthy foods.. you’ll love it!

Leave a comment

Join our Mailing List

Sign up to receive our daily email and get 50% off your first purchase.

My Cart

Subtotal: $0.00

Your cart is currently empty.